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Now that Markie got a hair transplant and it seems to work, that’s your cue to do the same thing, while you still can. You can even use it as the basis for a Good Question segment and get the station to pay for it, all while documenting the process.

You won’t have to use sprinkles anymore, you won’t be afraid to look in the mirror every morning, you can get something free from the station, and inform your rabid fans about what to expect if they decide to do it.

- From today’s viewer mailbag, not sure which is funnier: the fact that someone wrote to me suggesting I get a hair transplant, or the fact that he thinks the station would pay for it. (here’s what Sprinkles are)